Monday, October 19, 2009

Get Ready--This One Is Long.

On the night of Cub's first birthday last week, I sat in the bathroom, nervously eyeing the pregnancy test setting next to me on the counter. I took a deep breath and said a prayer. I prayed for calm nerves and, most importantly, peace. Peace with whatever the test revealed. I thanked God for the life I had now--for our home, our family. And I told Him I was truly satisfied with my life and grateful for it. I again took a deep breath, and this time it was out of contentment. Life is good. And I'm so thankful for what we have.

And the test was positive.

I gasped. The tears rushed to my face before I could stop them and I laughed and sobbed at the same time. My poor husband came running into the bathroom to check on me and, not wanting to ruin the surprise, I said (with a huge smile on my face and tears streaming down my cheeks), "Oh, I'm just not feeling well!" Yeah. Great fake, Katie. He peeked at the test in my hands and asked me if I was happy or sad. More tears came as I smiled and nodded. Then we both cried.

That's right friends. We're pregnant. Five weeks, to be exact.

:)

So, of course, there are questions involved once you make an announcement like that. Like, "WHAT?? So SOON??" and "You're telling at only FIVE weeks??" Okay, okay, those questions have been the exception rather than the norm (the reception has been overwhelmingly positive), but I figured this is a good vehicle through which to explain myself, as such an announcement often renders some sort of explanation.

Firstly, the "WHAT?? So SOON??" question.

Why, thank you for asking! Yes, Cub and le bebe will be close--twenty months apart, to be exact. Four months short of two years. I don't have a deep, philosophical or even logical explanation as to how we calculated the precise time to conceive (because we didn't), other than the fact that we simply want our kids close together. Yes, we know it will be chaotic, especially at first. Yes, we know we will have two in diapers. No, I'm not sure if I will be seeing straight when all is said and done. However, we're more excited than anything. We are, obviously, very aware of the "adventure" that lies ahead with two little ones, but we're so excited to jump in. And, who knows. Maybe after le bebe comes, we'll decide we were insane and wait a little longer for the next, if we choose to expand our little pack beyond two.

Also, a big factor in the decision is Cub himself. His personality just rocks. He IS his father's son. He's mellow and, well, easy. I realize toddlerhood brings a whole new slew of challenges and we're geared up for that. But, the truth of the matter is that Cub is just a low-maintenance, content baby. And we realize that. If Cub had, say, MY personality, perhaps we would be waiting longer to add another baby. :) Cub is the reason we want another baby. And he is also the reason we feel as confident as we do in having another one so soon.

Secondly! "You're telling at only FIVE weeks??"

Yes, yes, I know, we're seven weeks shy of the kosher twelve weeks. Believe it or not, there is an actual reason we are telling so soon, even though I don't believe you need a reason at all. People should be able to make the announcement whenever they want--it's a personal decision. But, like I said, we do have a reason. As many of you know, I miscarried in December 2007 and at the time, we didn't know why. In February 2008, I found out I was pregnant (with Cub) and six weeks into the pregnancy, my progesterone began to drop dangerously low. The doctor immediately put me on a progesterone supplement (that made me just a liiiiiiiiiiiittle crazy) and, as the previous pregnancy had ended at six weeks, they assumed the low progesterone was the culprit. So, this time around, the doctor is being extremely cautious. As soon as his office opened the next day after I found out I was pregnant, I called and they immediately sent me to our local hospital for blood work. That was last week. Everything looked good, thankfully, but I went in again today to check it again, as I am nearing the six week mark. Next week I will actually see the doctor and we will have my first ultrasound.

So, for us, the process of going to the doctor (and the hospital) began immediately. We wanted our friends and family to know so they could pray for Baby Baskins and go through this journey with us. And, once the cat is out of the bag, you might as well just tell everyone!! We are very aware that our pregnancy at this moment is considered high-risk and we're praying we make it through these next few weeks.

And, amidst all of the explanations and the questions and the "right" or "wrong" way of doing things, we are confident that, at this moment, this is God's plan for us. We prayed from day one that God would bless us with another baby only if it was His will and we were constantly (and are still constantly) so grateful for Cub and the joy our one baby boy has brought to our lives. There were several weeks of prayer and truly handing this desire over to Him, piece by piece. I found myself going to my knees and surrendering that desire. More than a baby, I wanted to trust God's plan. And His sovereignty. And it was only when I was truly, and I mean TRULY at peace with whatever He had in store, did we conceive.

And we still don't know how this will end. We never know how things will end. But we rejoice in the moment, in this moment, when I'm in the nursery rocking Cub and the precious baby inside of me at the same time. And we praise God for this moment.

And, we pray for more of these moments to come.

17 comments:

  1. Aww.. I am so happy for you guys! Such a blessing. I am giddy over here. I live vicariously through all my friends and bloggers, so I love the early announcements and the vivid posts. :) I had to just kind of jump in feet first (or head first, as I like to think of it, as in, in over my head) and while I am richly blessed, I've missed all except the positive pregnancy tests! Sounds like you are enjoying every moment, and I will pray with you that nothing goes wrong with this pregnancy, and baby Baskins enters this world in roughly 8 months. Praise God!

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  2. Thank you so much for sharing this news. I will be diligently praying for you and your family. I've learned so much from you and wished I knew you in college. You are a tremendous woman, wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend. Regardless of the outcome little Cubbie is so lucky to have the both of you as parents.

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  3. okay...so now I just read this and I'm praying more!!!

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  4. Oh Katie, this made me cry... I am so happy for you, and it is such a joy and privilege to hear about your spiritual journey through this process...

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  5. Congratulations Katie!! I pray that all goes well for you with this pregnancy. When I got pregnant with Obi I wasn't planning on telling everyone, but that was just how it happened. I was SO glad that it happened that way though. I'd rather have people praying for me and our baby throughout the whole thing anyway. I am happy for your little family.

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  6. Congrats! Just so you know 20 months apart is GREAT! Thats how far apart our first two and now we are on number three. . .this one 2 years from the last but I sure woun't have minded a little closer. So congratulations and hope all goes well.

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  7. Oh Katie, I'm just thrilled for you guys! Absolutely Presh! I am so happy you shared early so that I can add you to my prayer list and cover this little one in prayer. What a little miracle. I, too, shared early so that Levi would be prayed for by as many as possible. Also, I wanted those to rejoice with us and had something tragic happened, mourned with us. Ya know? I'm excited to follow this journey with you. What an exciting time! :) Praise God.

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  8. Praise God! I'm so excited for you and your family, many blessings and congratulations my friend!

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  9. Congratulations Katie!!! Sophia and our baby #2 will be exactly 20 months apart as well. I don't think you are crazy at all...it's a good age span; especially when the first one is 'easy' and has a great personality. They will be best of friends! ;)

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  10. This is fantastic. :) Thanks for sharing.

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  11. Congrats to you guys! I don't think it's too soon at all...I've wanted to have another one since Brock came out! And, I'm thinking since our baby history has been pretty similar up to this point (I also miscarried in Dec. '07, and Brock is just a month behind your little man), that maybe this is foreshadowing. ;)

    Thanks for the reminder to be content in all circumstances. I'll be praying for this new little one.

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  12. Katie, that is WONDERFUL news!!! So so thrilled for you and praying that this pregnancy gets off to a healthy start (and praying that you don't have to go through those darned progesterone supplements again!).

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  13. Well said. SO excited for you. Praying for you. Love you!

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  14. Katie! That is wonderful news! I am very excited for you and Josh. Robbie and I are living what you will be...Selah and Titus are 20 months apart. It is not easy, but it is wonderful, if that makes sense. Many days are very difficult, but the wonderful moments you get with a child are doubled with two! Titus ADORES his big sister, and Selah loves him just as much. It will be a blessing for you to see the dynamic between your two kiddos! I will be praying that things go well for you!

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  15. Congrats congrats congrats! I'll be praying for you, Josh, Cub, and the new baby! Can't wait to hear more about your fam's journey...I'm storing it all in my brain for when Nick and I decide to grow!

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  16. YEAH for babies close together. You're right, you won't see straight for a while, but it is soo much fun! And the good times grow sweeter as time passes. We're praying for you sweet cousin, and the health of baby baskins...
    love, love, and love!
    ruthie

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  17. Congratulations! Caleb is such a cute, fun baby to be around...I'll bet he'll be an excellent big brother. Jason and I had fun at his party.

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