Monday, January 30, 2012

Hubby Help.

Does your husband help a lot with the kiddos?

When I first read this question, I thought, "Yes! Now ... how am I going to expound on that?" As I thought through how life has changed since having our first, I realized that my husband has always been a help, but the level of his helpfulness has changed.

Let me explain.

After we had our first, my husband's primary role was to help me. I needed him to affirm me, to console me. He didn't exactly know what to with a newborn, but he did whatever I asked, trying to help. He changed diapers and such willingly, if I asked. When Naomi came along, he took over Cub duties whenever we went out, ate dinner, etc., and I dealt with Naomi. We sort of naturally slipped into the roles of him caring for the toddler and me caring for the baby, when need be. Again, he was great at doing anything I asked.

Then, this summer, something changed.

When I went to Vermont, I was gone for six days. My husband, while he had help some days, was now the primary caregiver to the kids. He had to take care of the kids intuitively, meaning, I wasn't there to ask for his help--he just had to figure it out. And, eventually, he had to just know what they needed. When I came home, I noticed how his helpfulness had changed. Instead of waiting for me to ask him what needed to be done, he figured it out. Instead of asking what the kids need to eat or drink, he just feeds them. Instead of hunting around trying to figure out how to pack their bags, he just does it and knows what to put in there. The other night I came home from Zumba with the kids and he had their rooms picked up and their jammies laid out on their beds and he immediately scooped them up, took them to their rooms, and took care of bedtime. This might not seem like a big deal to some, but it's a big deal to me--knowing how to care for two kids (one a boy, one a girl), with two different personalities, and sometimes vastly different needs (different cups, different foods, one potty-trained, one not, etc.), is challenging for me some days (a lot of days!). For my husband to be able to come home from the job he works so hard at all day and be able to seamlessly step right into Job #2 of being Dad ... it blows my mind sometimes! I'm very, very thankful for him.

So, to answer your question, yes, he's a huge help ... and that means more than I can really explain. :)

Have a lovely day!

1 comment:

  1. So interesting to see how your tag-teaming has evolved through three children! I don't know how so many women mother on their own...I would probably end each day in my closet in the fetal position without Jonathan :)