Thursday, July 7, 2011

If This Never Happens To You, I'll Go Ahead And Bury My Head In The Sand.

The other day I decided to make some cinnamon rolls for my husband. He had eaten some at the party the previous night that made him swoon, so I figured I would try to replicate the awesomeness so he could have some sweets to take to work.

I started in the evening and about halfway through, I realized this was going to be a rather lengthy endeavor. The kids were getting restless and cranky and were pulling on my legs as I rolled out the dough. My husband and I got them to bed and I returned to the kitchen to finish the rolls. I can't pintpoint exactly the moment of epic failure, but between too much butter, a misread extract, and not enough dough, I found myself up to my armpits in what I thought was perhaps an unsalvageable mess. But, I forced through and my determination resulted in three pans of cinnamon rolls. Fresh out of the oven, they tasted pretty good. At least, I thought so.

My husband tried one and nodded and said it was okay.

That's it.

My hours of slaving for a nod of the head and a "it's okay".

I'm not sure what snapped in my head, perhaps a feeling of underappreciation mixed with exhaustion (and, let's not forget, pregnancy hormones), but I gave him a glare and with much dramatic huffing and flailing of arms, I stormed to the bedroom and shut the door.

A few moments later he cracked it open and asked if I was okay.

And then the crying started.

The ugly crying. The heaving. I can't remember the following conversation verbatim, but here's the basic gist of it:

"YOU DON'T LIKE MY CINNAMON ROLLS!"

"I didn't say that!"

"I KNOW YOU DIDN'T LIKE THEM! I MESSED THEM UP!"

(Snort, snort, sniffle.)

"It's fine! They weren't bad!"

"'WEREN'T BAD'?? THAT MEANS YOU HATED THEM!"

"KATIE. The cinnamon rolls are fine! I appreciate you making them!"

"THE KITCHEN IS A MESS AND IT'S LATE AND I DON'T WANT TO CLEAN IT!"

"Uh, okay. Don't clean it then!"

"I'M GONNA HAVE THREE KIDS!!"

(Pause.)

"Um, what?"

"WE'RE GONNA HAVE THREE KIDS!! HOW IN THE WORLD CAN I HANDLE THREE KIDS?!"

"I thought we were talking about cinnamon rolls."

"I DON'T THINK I CAN DO IT! I DON'T THINK I CAN BE A GOOD MOM TO THREE LITTLE KIDS!"

"Uh, Katie?"

"I DRIVE A MINIVAN!!"

"Oh boy."

"I'M GOING TO HAVE THREE KIDS AND I DRIVE A MINIVAN! WHO AM I?! I CAN'T EVEN MAKE CINNAMON ROLLS!!"

"Oh geez. Okay. Katie, I think you're overthinking this ..."

"I HAVE TO CHANGE DIAPERS AND TEACH OUR KIDS TO WALK AND TALK AND THEN I HAVE TO KEEP THE HOUSE CLEAN AND COOK AND BAKE AND KEEP THE LAUNDRY UP AND (snort, snort, sob) ..."

"Calm down. You do a great job."

"AND MY JOB DESCRIPTION IS JUST 'STAY-AT-HOME'!" ARE YOU KIDDING?? WHAT BOZO COINED THAT TERM?!"

"Katie, go to bed."

"I'M JUST ... I'm just ... (sob, sob)"

"You're tired."

"I'm tired."

"It's not about the cinnamon rolls."

"It is a little."

"Go to bed."

"THREE KIDS."

"Go to bed."

(Pause.)

"Okay."

And I did.

Have a lovely day.

18 comments:

  1. This made me laugh--in utter sympathy. I will say though, that I make cinnamon rolls regularly, and PW's are among my least favorite, because they require waaaaay more butter than needed (and I don't shy away from butter usage) and are just more complicated than they need to be. The frosting is fantastic, so I usually use that on other, less complicated recipes. I don't know anyone who has tried that recipe without several snafus.

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  2. yup.... on a number of occasions.... :)

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  3. I only have one little and I am sure I have uttered that statement more than once too :) I think hormones plus tiredness always gets the best of us mommys. but at least we can look back on it and laugh. and thank goodness for sweet husbands who remind us we can do it and God will help us.

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  4. This made me laugh out loud...because we've ALL been there! Hormones + being tired gets to us...and being a mom is hard. Especially when you are trying to juggle everything else perfectly too. Hang in there! You are a great mom.

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  5. This made me laugh because I relate. Sometimes between teaching school and keeping up with the house and my son, I just get exhausted and do the same thing. Not to mention that when you put that much effort into something you want to hear, "wow amazing!" Maybe all the poor husbands should start a "my wife is an emotional rollercoaster club". :)

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  6. LOL!!!! Some form of this conversation has happened a few times in our house throughout this pregnancy! You're not alone, and I trust God that we will all survive. :)

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  7. Oh sweet Katie...I was laughing out loud at this post! Thanks for sharing so vulnerably. I know it all must seem so overwhelming right now, but I have to tell you...remember how I said that I just knew you wouldn't be finished after Naomi? It was honestly because I look at you and see someone who was just MEANT to be a mother. It would be a shame not to give at least one more baby the gift of having YOU as his or her mama. So get the tears and crazy hormones out of your system, eat a few cinnamon rolls, and rest assured that God is going to give you grace and will equip you with everything you need to be an incredible mother to three beautiful children. Sure it will be crazy, and you might feel crazy, but just imagine about twenty years from now when all three of your kids come home for Christmas, and they are all close in age and love each other, and they all think you hung the moon. I think that's worth a little crazy :)

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  8. And the award for the longest comment in the history of blogging goes to... (drumroll) ... LESLIE! :)

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  9. Oh sister I feel ya!!!! I have 3 under 3, I have had that conversation many, many times at our house! hang in there, I've found jars of nutella makes it all a little easier to swallow! :)

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  10. Haha. I have a mini "break-down" of this sorts every once in a blue moon. But mostly it just starts with me blurting out "Andy, what was I thinking? We're going to have TWO kids! How can I handle Elsie AND a baby. What were we thinking?!"

    He generally just gives me a look and the conversation ends with me saying "I was just wondering."

    :) I can't imagine three. (even though I want 5 haha)

    xo,
    Christen
    christenkrumm.blogspot.com

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  11. I don't even have kids but my husband has suffered through PLENTY of conversations like that with me! Ha :)

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  12. I LOVE what Leslie wrote...And your post made me cry. I TOTALLY get it. Only have two, but my oh my...totally get it.

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  13. Oh my word, BEEN THERE!!! You don't need to stick your head in the sand. You are such a good Mom, and you're right: the title of stay-at-home is so ridiculous. You are going to do GREAT with your crew of three, and, you know, the ugly cries are okay every once and awhile, too. :) Love you!

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  14. Pretty sure you're not a "good" mom if you don't have this happen every so often :)
    Thanks for being honest. I have so far survived 29 hours husband-less, with another 17 to go, with a 2 year old and a 2 month old. I had a similar (un-cinnamon roll related) breakdown before he left :)
    And you know, for good measure, the Sunday school answer. God won't give you anything you can't handle. With His help. :)

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  15. HAHA! It's so weird how the smallest things can set us off, isn't it? It's like we don't even know we are near our limit and then something like that happens and it all spills out at once. We all do it, girl. Don't think you're crazy! I once bawled over a meringue on a pie I was making for Darin. :)

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  16. HAHAHAHA I promise I am not laughing AT you...I've had more than my share of "cinnamon rolls" tears and breakdowns.

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  17. Ok, so unlike everyone else, I am sitting here crying. Having my own mini meltdown. Man, I don't have three kids, but I can't make cinnamon rolls and I can't cook worth a darn, but I sure do try. I think this weather is getting to me or something. Today I've been so cranky, like to the point I was just mad, but something about this post is making me sit here and sob. Oh my, what is wrong with me?

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